The ghost of Linda Mary Place

 R.I.P. Linda

                                              Ghosts don't dance

Technically, my wife has not left a ghost, yet going upstairs, I can still see the position her body was in when she held her final breath.

Her final years were wracked with pain and issues with her disability getting worse.

Her great fear was to end her life as her mother did, suffering from dementia; it can't have helped knowing her sister, who is eight years older, had a stroke months before she passed away, we were told a few weeks after my wife passed, her sister had another stroke, and now has no memory of her life.

Linda passed as she wished, in a house full of love, with her family by her side. Her other fear was to die in a hospital.

Will it be a Happy New Year for me?

 R.I.P. Linda

Tomorrow starts another New Year. This will be the first New Year I'll be seeing in with my lovely wife, Linda, who passed away in January, 2025.

Romance in Redcliffe

One hope I have us that my relationship with my friend, Clara, who lives in Redcliffe , Bristol, will develop into a romance

Only the Lonely

St. Valentine's Day

R.I.P. Linda

Today, St.Valentine's Day, should have been a lovely, romantic day, for me, it is a day of sadness. This is the first time, in 39 years, my lovely Linda is not with me

You left us with lovely memories, darling. We had our ups, and downs, but overall we had a solid marriage.

 

Is it better to have loved and lost?

 What becomes of the broken-hearted?

R.I.P. Linda

I cannot recall who said it, but a writer wrote, "It is far better to have loved, and lost, than not to have loved at all."

For my part, I disagree, I had nearly 40 years of love, and happiness with my wonderful wife, Linda, who died in January 2025. Now, what is left?

I don't live, I exist, my life is now one of being here so my family has some stability. I am left feeling empty, lonely, and suffering from a growing sense of depression

To my Daling Linda,

 Happy Anniversary

R.I.P. Linda

Today should have been a wonderful day of celebration for us, it would have been our 39th wedding anniversary, instead, it is a day of deep sorrow for; it is the first time in 39 years you are not with me, love.

We miss you so much, yet we are grateful your pain and misery has ended. You never liked having your photograph taken, so we have few on file, but you left us with wonderful memories, and a residue of love which will not dry

The Longest Day

 St. Valentine's Day

                                                R.I.P. Linda

Today was supposed to be a romantic day for lovers, for me, it marks the first month without you, my lovely Linda. I know you passed on Friday January 17th, but as the month has 31 days, today is four weeks since you left us 😢😢😢

Today has been long, and painful for me, love, the grief of your loss is something I doubt I will revover from; out solace is you died how, and where you wanted, and you are not in pain 

🙏🙏🙏

R.I.P. Linda

 Linda's Garden

         Valentine's Day

We had so many plans for this year, but my wife has passed away last month.

St. Valentine's Day is considered the most romantic day of the year for lovers, for me it will be the saddest day. This year, it will be the last time I see my lovely wife as she lays in the Chapel of Rest, before her cremation.

Ruby Wedding Anniversary

 R.I.P. Linda

Harry Potter

Happy  Anniversary

This weekend showed have been a joyful time for me, it would have been our Ruby Wedding Anniversary, 40 years, we passed 40 years of being a couple last year, as we met 18 months before we got married.

However, it will be a sad day, it is the second wedding anniversary since my wife passed away in January, 2025.

I am reminded of some of the happier moments of her last years, such as seeing The Hairy Bikers in Bristol, going to the Harry Potter World in London, and seeing some fox cbs at play in our garden.

Happy Anniversary, love

A Magical Christmas

  R.I.P. Linda

                                                                    Bristol Wildlife

Though my late wife was in such a lot of pain at Christmas, she left with lovely memories of her last Christmas.

Our daughter, Felicity, took her around Bristol to see the Christmas lights on the houses; she wanted to make a dinner for us, which she did, and she saw the fox litter in our garden.

In her final days, she was in so much pain, she couldn't stand. We miss her, but we know she would not have been happy to have lived on in more pain.

Nemesis

 Me and my phone

R.I.P. Linda

A long-standing joke in our family is I call myself the Nemesis of the cellphone.

While it sounds weird, it is true.

My late wife would spend hours playing games on her phone, as she was bedridden for the last two years of her life; she was taken into Southmead Hospital, and diagnosed with pleurisy, and pneumonia; which left her both weak, and struggling to breath. 

I rarely use my cellphone, other than to keep in contact with my children via Whatsapp.

YouTube

 Netflix

R.I.P. Linda

My lovely wife who passed away last month, spent most of her last year watching either YouTube, or Netflix. I was pleased I could pay for YouTube Premium so her last months were enjoyable.

She'd made plans for this year, but we knew she was doing this to make us happy, in the end my wife could not stand without severe pains.

My Avebury trip

 R.I.P. Linda

                                          Happy Anniversary

Next month should have been our Ruby Wedding Anniversary, however, it will be the second wedding anniversary without my lovely wife 💔💔😢😢. She always wished to visit the stone circle at Avebury, I will try to go there in her memory this year.

I wish to visit Avebury for reasons on my own, the pub is "supposed" to be haunted by the ghost of a maid, who dislikes men with a beard.

Spirit in the Sky

My Wife will be Pleased

R.I.P. Linda

Though my wife passed away in January, we feel her spirit around us.

I feel she is watching over us, and this news will please her; in the last week, our cat, Cooper - AKA Princess - has come out of her shell. She often sleeps with me, if I sleep in the front room, before she would not come to me, only to my wife, ot our daughter Sarah.

Downsizing

 R.I.P. Linda

Would I re-marry?

Romance in Didcot

Since my wife passed away in January, the idea of downsizing has been on my mind. There are other matters which stop me, apart from having to do the house clean out.

The reasons I can't move are I have family issues here in Bristol, which mean I am trapped, and I couldn't afford to move. I was considering a move, if my romance with a lady I know in Didcot, Oxfordshire, blossomed., as she did ask if I was interested in marriage? In the future, if she asked me to move in with her, it would have been a possibility. I say would, as my situation isn't likely to change.

If my situation was not so complex, I would possibly consider re-marrying.

Avebury Stone Circle

 The Ghost of the Red Lion

R.I.P. Linda

Hopefully, this year I hope to fulfill one of my late wife's wishes. She wished to visit the Avebury Stone Circle. I would like to visit the site, not only to fulfill her wish, but for two reasons of my own.

The first reason is I am interested in the circle as a historic site. History is one of my main interests. 

The second reason is curiosity, and a challenge. Inside the circle, there is an inn "supposedly" with the ghost of a former barmaid who disliked men with beards, ladies disliking beards is not uncommon. This story was highlighted on the YouTube channel Ghost Casebook.

Apparently, if a man with a beard orders a beer, the glass will mysteriously move on the counter. I have my theory on this, but it is so mundane it would bore the reader.

There is also a stone circle at Stanton Drew, I wish to visit. This is a visit I can take by foot as Stanton Drew is only a few miles from my house in Hartcliffe, Bristol

The year of HELL

A Year to forget 

R.I.P. Linda

For several years, I have challenged the New Year, to be worse than this year; and each year has got worse. If 2025 is worse than 2024, I think I won't see the end of the year.

2024 started with bad news from the DWP, which cut our income by 1/3 for three months, that was followed by another cut from the Department of Works and Pensions, affecting only me.

 A month later is was taken ill by a virus, not Covid, which affected me for several weeks, then I visited hospital for a check-up, and caught a virus, this could have been Covid as I was already weak. I was in the same hospital, and at the same time, which Princess Anne was taken to after her injury.

We found out that we had been systemically robbed over a period of time, as we're disabled pensioners, by our neighbours. This lead to a bout of depression which we are still going through.

My ankle has been getting worse as I am unable to walk; a month ag, w had another family crisis which affected us gravely.

I think, if next year is worse than this year, I won't be able to cope.

I was so down, after my 15 year struggle to be recognised as a writer, I allowed myself to be a scam victim.

2025 began with the death of my wife in January, I am still suffering, though it is now September.

My misery is not over, as I think our eldest cat won't be with us for much longer, he is not eating, and spends a lot of his time sleeping. My only consolation, if you can call it that, is he is late middle-aged for a cat, as he is 15 years old, but his loss will hit me hard.

Back to my pre-RAF Lossiemouth days

 R.I.P. Linda

No dairy

In the days since my wife passed away, I have reverted back to the days before I was posted to RAF Lossiemouth, Morayshire, Scotland. While I was stationed there, I got to know some USAAF airmen who introduced me to coffee, before then I was a tea drinker.

Since January, 2025, I have gone back to drinking tea, this has improved my mental health, and as I don't need to take milk with my tea, the change has helped my finances as I am a pensioner.

Cutting coffee out has also helped me control my weight as I don't use as much sugar, and don't eat sugary biscuits. Another factor in my weight loss is changing from cooking with fats, to cooking with oil, often garlic oils as garlic is good for many health reasons.

Was it coincidence?

  Was it fate?

                                                                               R.I.P. Linda

My wife had been ill for several months, before she passed in January of 2025.

From the moment I met her, her son Matthew, was determined to separate us. What he could not achieve in life, he did with his death the previous August from a drug overdose.

She had said she was waiting for the knock on the door, though she was ill, his death destroyed her health, and my happiness; her son won his battle, even if he never knew about it.

A kingdom with no cats

 Bleak House

R.I.P.Linda

In the days since my wife died, in January, the house has changed greatly.

Not only is the house lacking her love, warmth, and kindness, but there are minor changes which show her loss too.

When I go the the freezer, I find it half-empty, as there is only our daughter, Sarah living with me - the other children have their lives to live in the Bristol area - that is all the food we need.

Our cat family of five has moved out, leaving only Sarah's dog, Winnie with us. This could be seen as a good plan by the cats, as they know I am getting older, and are seeking new families to care for them

Am I going mad?

 R.I.P. Linda

I am losing what is left of my sanity

Since my lovely wife passed away, I have had trouble recalling the days, mostly because most days are the same, also my depression deepens as the days pass. I may not cry as much, but the heartbreak never goes.

Today is Sunday, October 5th, all day I have thought it was a Monday